Article! Flirting Lessons by Mariela Cavani

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I know, me, myself, am a huge admirer of hers, that Elizabeth Bennet is one of the most influential heroines of  literature. What I most admire of this Jane Austen´s character is her ability to response, she is always  ahead of others and knows what to say even when her opinion is wrong. In Jane Austen´s famous book, Pride and Prejudice, these brilliant thoughts are usually introduced in her dialogs with Mr Darcy, whom, in the beginning, she disregards for his vanity, stubborn, arrogance and proud manners, although he vanishes his manners with her in the path of the story; nevertheless, Lizzy doesn´t feel his changes because of the prejudice she has for him.

So, even when she is still prejudice about him, her conversations with Darcy are spiced up with lots of flirtation, but not any flirtation but a smart one and a little pretentious. For example, in chapter VI, when, for the first time, she realizes that Darcy has started to stare at her at reunions and balls, she throws at him this question:
Did you not think, Mr Darcy, that I expressed myself uncommonly well just now, when I was teasing Colonel Foster to give us a ball at Meryton?
Ahead in the chapter, when she passes by Sir Lucas, who was accompanying Darcy at the moment, encouraging him with his eloquent dialogs, and Lucas push her to dance with Darcy, Jane Austen herself explains that Elizabeth refuses Sir Lucas proposal with an “archly” look at Darcy and retires.

Another classic example of the flirt happens when, to accompany her sick sister Jane, Elizabeth stays in Netherfield Park and sees, herself, obliged to socialize with the Bingley siblings, the Hurst and Mr Darcy. In these chapters, the growing interest of Darcy for Elizabeth is shown, it is obvious how are to hers all his attentions and reserve compliments and how Lizzy ignores him and puts on evidence, even, the poor Mr Darcy´s patience.

I am no longer surprised at your knowing only six accomplished women. I rather wonder now at your knowing any. Says she in one of these circumstances when the party chatted about what makes virtuous the ladies of the time: to have knowledge about music, singing, drawing and modern languages, and –Darcy points it out, in deference to Lizzy, I guess, because she likes to read– reading. Darcy exposes that he barely knows half dozen of these perfect women meanwhile Lizzy disqualified his demands daring him to the possibility that he maybe doesn´t know any woman who has all these merits.

There are lots of details like these in every Darcy and Lizzy meet, when they finally make their first dance, every Darcy´s charm and every Elizabeth´s flirt by return. When they meet in Rosings, is another example, while she plays the piano, the sort-of flirtation starts. In the chapter XXXI, Lizzy seems intimidated by Darcy´s proximity, she is rude with him, acts like she doesn´t care about his friendship, and resent, with elegance, that he didn´t dance with anyone when they first met, at the public ball in Meryton. My favorite flirtation in this chapter happens when, to take Darcy´s look and words over her, she says to colonel Fitzwilliam, Darcy´s cousin, that her fingers are in need to his commands to continuing playing the piano.
Taking notes of these details, occurs to me to make this guide, from Elizabeth Bennet herself. Thirty five lessons that will teach us how to be flirty in a charm and smart way.

Lesson #1
If you´re not pretty enough to tempt him: make him suffer refusing to dance with him in the next ball, laugh at him with your friends and have the virtue to have fun of the silly things (chapter 3).

Lesson #2
If he is proud: you can be prejudice.

Lesson #3
If he stares at you with persistence: your natural charm and joy can be your best stratagems. Although, your impertinence can be a positive thing, as the fine old saying says: “keep your breath to cool your porridge” (chapter 6).

Lesson #4
If surprisingly he happens to be accepting another´s initiative to dance with him: flirt with him saying no, it´ll make him to ask for himself in the next ball (chapter 6).

Lesson #5
If the master plan of your mother is to send your dear sister to another´s house under the rain so she can get sick and stay in that house to pick a husband: you must go to save her, there´s a husband in there for you too.

Lesson #6
Exercise can bring luminosity to your eyes and enlighten your face. And he will be attracted to you (chapter 8).

Lesson #7
Your free mind and spirit can mean you´re presumptuous and abominable to him, but he will end up admiring these qualities from you.

Lesson #8
Make reading your activity of the day.

Lesson #9
Find pleasure in many things.

Lesson #10
Keep him safe even when you don´t like him. Remember that he has a complex character and the poor nerves of your mother are not sensitive (chapter 9).

Lesson #11
Dare him with smart arguments.

Lesson #12
Don´t be convinced that his stares are because he has interests in you. He could be dismissing your relatives.

Lesson #13
If he invites you to dance, by self initiative, reject him only for the pleasure of not to please what he expects from you. (chapter 10).

Lesson #14
Ignore him by using a playful sarcasm (chapter 11).

Lesson #15
If that other girl uses you to attract, to herself, his attentions, could be a benefit to you. And it makes him to take out one of his lucky charms (chapter 11). 

Lesson #16
Spice your talks with dares and sarcasm.

Lesson #17
When you finally accept to dance with him, make him talk by force, it could be your best revenge for his pride, vanity and arrogance (chapter 18).

Lesson #18
Censure his faults in yourself. He will know that you are picturing him.

Lesson #19
If you are kind with every one else but him, this would make him come to you.

Lesson #20
Let your braveness grow when he tries to intimidate you, even when he is not actually trying, he just want to get approach to you (chapter 31).

Lesson #21
Do not find pleasure in bearing opinions that are not yours.

Lesson #22
Do not judge him. He only dances with people he knows.

Lección #23
Have a naïve flirt with his friend.

Lesson #24
Forgive him, he is not good making friends.

Lesson #25
Go and take a stroll within the park.

Lesson #26
When you call yourself sick: he will come running to see you… And propose to you.

Lesson #27
Let the love be your folly.

Lesson #28
Even when it looks like you have come to see him, go to his house at Pemberley (chapter 43).

Lesson #29
Keep as a treasure his family secret.

Lesson #30
If his powerful aunt comes to threaten you, let her know that you are not giving up on him. This make him to renew his marriage proposal (chapter 56).

Lesson #31
Thank him because he save your stupid sister, and whole family, from disgrace.

Lesson #32
If there´s no possibility to take a ramble within the park: look for new paths where you can get yourself lose with him. 

Lesson #33
Ask him, tenderly, when was the time he felt in love with you (chapter 60).

Lesson #34
Save him from conversations that can make him uncomfortable.

Lesson #35
And laugh out loud: you have conquered Mr Darcy.

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This article was written by Mariela Cavani, a wonderful venezolan girl, janeite and lover the good novels with a happy ending :). You can read her article about Tom Lefroy here

She usually writes the blogs "Cine, Libros y Jane Austen" and Ficción Femenina. Thanks Mariela!